Heal yourselves, one group call at a time

Payal Chatterjee, senior sales executive, Indigo, put on her red lipstick and got dressed up last Saturday evening. Her mom almost had a panic attack! “Where are you going? The country’s under lockdown!” She breathed a sigh of relief when she saw her daughter calmly switch on her laptop, sharp at 8.30 pm, and raise a toast with four of her friends in different cities, all ready for a video party.All dressed up. All in red lipstick.
“Last Saturday, it was red lipstick. Next Saturday, it’s going to be an LBD video party,” she says, adding, “I don’t know why we are calling it social distancing. It’s more physical distancing – socially, we are making an extra effort to catch up every day. This video party was planned this morning when we all decided it’s time to lift our spirits. With technology on our side, we can shake this overwhelming feeling of gloom and doom.”
Chuck that feeling of doom
It’s happening all over the world. People are catching up with long-lost school friends, calling their parents more often, playing cards and other games with colleagues after work hours, and celebrating birthdays, anniversaries – all over video parties.
Sanghamitra Mukherjee, talent acquisition partner, AIA Group office in Hong Kong, caught up with her school friend through a long video chat a few days ago. They were all connected on a WhatsApp ‘school group’. But where was the time to have one-on-one conversations in a group? “As bad as the situation is right now, I finally had the time to catch up. What I realised was that we could have done this a million times before if only our minds weren’t as cluttered as they usually are.”
It’s not as if this lockdown has made her stress-free, but it did give Mukherjee the much-needed break from the robotic life that we are all accustomed to. “This video call made me feel my friend was right beside me. And it helped me understand that this is our battle, together. No one is alone. We are fighting it collectively. A sense of calm came over me after the chat. I felt safe.”
Dr Samir Parikh, psychiatrist, puts things in perspective when he says, “The whole world is collectively helping one another through self-quarantine. If anything, this pandemic is teaching us every day that we are all interdependent. Coronavirus spread through the world because we are all interdependent; and it’s through this same interdependence — staying connected while maintaining physical distance — that we can all heal.”
IshaKapur, who runs a business in interior decoration, parties with her friends through Houseparty (video app). “It’s not just partying or playing games with friends; I’m looking forward to my online pilates class at 5 pm this evening. Maintaining our everyday routine keeps us grounded.” Sumer Vikram Singh, petroleum engineer with Halliburton Offshore Services, is using this time to connect with long-lost friends, and have “deep conversations”, something he didn’t have the time for earlier. “I just hope this new habit becomes sustainable. We must rethink everything about our lives,” he says.
Dr Parikh concurs. “The whole world is off the roller-coaster of life it had gotten used to. We all have this void – it’s not a bad thing. Rather a perfect opportunity to get acquainted with our own feelings. We are realising just how much we need other people for our own wellbeing.”
Void isn’t a bad word
Pranav Juneja, who owns a family business, got to understand the immense joy of connecting people when he taught his 60+ grandparents how to play Tambola on Zoom (video app) with their friends! “It was so heartening to see them enjoying themselves. I think we are all slowly understanding that simple things, like connecting with old friends, seeing our loved ones happy, go a long way in keeping us anxiety-free. Even when all this is over, we must develop this as a habit.”
For PayPal executive DeepaliButalia, the video chats are a great way to keep her mind sharp while playing knowledge-based games. “For our age group (20-30 years), video-based parties and knowledge-based games have become the saviour.” Though she warns, “It’s only fun if you’re not doing this 24x7, staying awake at night. Slot time on weekends for parties, and play games with whoever is free after work-hours for an hour. Don’t get addicted,” she advises.
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This pandemic is teaching us every day that we are all interdependent. Coronavirus spread through the world because we are all interdependent; and it’s through this same interdependence –– staying connected while maintaining physical distance –– that we can all heal
— Dr Samir Parikh, psychiatrist